Today was another visit to Dr. Alford’s office. He took out Carter’s stitches and the orange cushions that were protecting it. Carter started crying when he was pulling on it and cutting the thread out but I think it was more from being afraid than from pain. He cried for a few more minutes but Dr. Alford was quick to clean all of the “goo” from his eyelashes and around his eye. He gave us the card to the ocularist and told me to call him today and make an appointment in 3-4 weeks. I asked how long it takes to make the prosthetic and he said it was something they do that day. It is an all day affair and may require another visit the next day to make sure it is fitting correctly. Our appointment is set for December 4th.
When we left the office, his eye was still pretty much closed because the doctor had put some antibiotic ointment on it. His eye didn’t seem any different to me. It was a little red and puffy from the stitches so he wore his sunglasses. We went to the zoo for a couple of hours before we went and picked Topher up from school and had a good time being “normal” for a few moments.
Since dinner, he has been able to open his eye as much as it will at this point. He came into my room and told me his eye looked empty. It’s a pretty accurate description. I am having a hard time looking at him right now. Not because it’s gross (which it is) but because it does seem empty. Carter’s eyes have always been his “thing.” His eyes tell a story and express so much of who he is. The one thing I was afraid of was that somehow, that part of him would be missing. I know without a doubt that this surgery was the right thing and I know Carter has not changed, but I think this could be the hardest part for me.